It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
Randomize
