Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
The only dream I remember having is one where my dad's sperm turned into baby hippos. Like, tiny baby hippos, pocket-sized. I am so fucked up.
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
Randomize
