I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
Randomize
