it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
what has become of my life if the best thing thats happened to me this week is that i discovered my cleavage as the best hiding spot ever for weed.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
