I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
I'd cum for enchiladas.
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
Randomize
