i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
How dare sober me try to tell drunk me I can't eat the applesauce in the fridge! Stingy bitch IM EATING THE APPLESAUCE! you can tell sober me I said that.
Randomize
