I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Randomize
