thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
My gut is currently telling me that Jesus did not intend for us to eat shrimp pad thai on Easter
Is this a considering it or regretting it text?
I just shit out what feels like an entire shrimp with claws and all. You tell me.
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
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