You're my little dorito
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
Yeah man... I ordered donuts, drank wine, and cried to a movie with Seth Rogen in it. Do you really think I have my shit together?
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
Randomize