turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
Actions speak louder than pants.
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
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