none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
Randomize
