How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
Randomize
