I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
im six kinds of drunk right now
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
Randomize
