She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
Randomize
