Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(508): View more from Massachusetts

Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower

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(404): View more from Georgia

you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is

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(727): View more from Florida

I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?

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(817): View more from Texas

he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.

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(317): View more from Indiana

I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.

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(325): View more from Texas

Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???

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(843): View more from South Carolina

he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...

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(860): View more from Connecticut

The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless

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(510): View more from California

good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.

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