I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
I heard the bride mutter "I should have brought a fucking tranquilizer". I'm not at all surprised that you got banned from the bar afterwards.
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
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