Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
Randomize
