Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
Randomize