vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
Randomize
