There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Randomize
