i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
The streets are paved with hand jobs
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