porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
tell your sister to shave her snatch
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
Randomize
