Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
you mean i was at the winter classic?
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Randomize
