i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
one word: firstdatebathroomanal
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize