Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
Randomize
