There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Randomize
