why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
Randomize