do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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