Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
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