three words: i give head
three words: not that well
can u get pink eye on your cock?
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
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