Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
Randomize
