Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
Randomize
