Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
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