I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
Randomize
