I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
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