Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
two words: eviction party
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Randomize
