if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
