Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
