Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
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