i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Randomize
