like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
I don't get promposals. When I asked my date I was so drunk I couldn't lift my head. Then I puked on my lawn after he said "ok whatever". That's romance
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
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