garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
Banned from zoo.
Again?
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Randomize
