let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
Can you put "designated driver" on a resume?
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
I'm too high and old for this...
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
Success! We fucked roommates!
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
Randomize
