Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
i was just outside smoking and i saw a hooker sing "i wish i knew who your daddy was" to her new born baby. someone explain to me why i ever left chicago to go to college...
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
Accidentally peeing a little on the couch in the middle of a sneeze is way different from railing a random on our waffle counter. I am the better roommate.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
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