I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
I woke up in my own vomit, a chunk of cactus in my thigh, shirtless, with jons mom poking at me with a glass of dr pepper and a talk about god....damn alcohol
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
Randomize
