tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
Actions speak louder than pants.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
My new hangover cure is going for a haircut, just so the stylists give me a scalp massage during the shampoo.
That certainly explains the nine times your hair has looked different just this last month alone.
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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