So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
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