Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
I knew you were drunk when you poured scotch on a croissant and ate it.
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
Did I show you my penis last night?
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
Randomize
