it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize
