i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
My brain says no but my pants say off.
Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
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