she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
